This is the time of year when we traditionally pause, spend a few quiet moments reviewing the previous twelve months and contemplate the year ahead by making our New Year resolutions.
This process of pause and review can be very helpful and, if undertaken mindfully, it essentially mirrors the Taoist meditation technique I use every day as an invaluable way of connecting to my Higher or Authentic Self, enabling me to learn, grow and attract positive energy into my life.
When embarking on the process of personal reflection and goal setting at this time of year, I would like you to be mindful of some common ‘Ego traps’ that can seriously impact the success of the process and your self-worth!…
1. Don’t dismiss meditation as mumbo-jumbo
Scientists continue to measure the beneficial effects that meditation practice has on our mind, emotional patterns, and general health and wellbeing, yet I still find many people misunderstand the practice of meditation, believing it to be a religious or mystical practice that will somehow detrimentally affect their free-thinking or decision-making. Recently, for instance, when I suggested a meditation technique to one of my clients she replied that she was fearful because she did not want to lose control.
Nothing could be further from the truth: meditation is a healthy practice that helps you gain mindful control of your own destiny, connecting you with your Authentic or Higher Self and the Universal flow of energy, allowing you to live your life following harmonious patterns that are beneficial to your wellbeing.
2. Don’t use your personal review as a stick to beat yourself with
As part of the process of mindful review remember to throw away your Ego’s measuring stick, which can critically underestimate and belittle your personal progress, and perhaps even more fundamentally, never look back on past situations and blame or condemn yourself or others. Instead I urge you to embrace honesty, acceptance and learning as part of your meditation and review process.
With an honest heart and mind ask yourself when and how you could have acted differently? Know and accept with loving kindness that, if you’d been equipped with the appropriate knowledge, understanding and skills to authentically deal with any ‘problem’ situation or person at the time you wouldn’t now be left with feelings of internal disharmony. Then embrace any lingering feelings of imbalance and the situations or people they are tied to for what they are: opportunities for personal learning and growth.
This is a profound Taoist teaching: there must always be a Universal lesson for you in any challenging, difficult or painful energetic situation, or else you would have flowed through the energy in balance and harmony (your Wu-Wei) and not moved into the extremes of the energy as an avoidance strategy.
So, as you undertake your mindful mediation and review ask yourself: “what is there for me to learn from this situation, person, or energy field“?
Take time to fully understand the energy of any situation you encounter as, for it to exist, it has to have extreme ‘Yin’ and ‘Yang’ aspects and the wide spectrum between these extremes. This understanding is fundamental in appreciating the whole energy of the situation and armed with this new wider perspective you can steadfastly chart your central Wu-Wei path through any energetic event and respond emotionally and practically as your Higher, Authentic Self.
This is true mindfulness: always finding the Wu Wei (centre) of any energy.
This process of reflection and learning can take practice, but remember the Ego loves taking the easy option of punishing your for past ‘mistakes’ or ‘wrong’ decisions, and this can be an all too comfortable form of self-harm and avoidance. Avoidance is a basic Ego misunderstanding, with the strong yet misguided intention of protection! It seems momentarily beneficial to flow away from the Wu-Wei centre into the extremes and avoid the emotional pain and learning, but this also means that you are moving away from the Universal lesson of balance and harmony (Wu-Wei).
As part of your mindful reflection and review be particularly aware of patterns of behaviour where you find yourself emotionally avoiding certain people or situations, as this always points to a misunderstanding in your belief system, that unless corrected, will block and stagnate your potential and self-worth as well as your general wellbeing. Through practice this simple technique will become extremely powerful, your senses will become heightened to the same kind of situations/people reappearing, and any lessons and misunderstandings in your thinking connected to the energy will become clearer.
In my experience, once you understand the situation and identify your misunderstandings, in most cases the solution requires just a minor emotional adjustment and realignment in your belief system and patterns of thinking. Of course changing the habitual nature of dealing with the energy may take a little longer to ‘reprogramme’ but, to reemphasise the point, never condemn yourself for your misunderstandings because this will only cause more blocks and stagnations in your energy flow.
Embrace the learning!
3. Don’t limit yourself to a 12 month review
How many of us have missed the fabulous synchronicities the Universe sends us because we’ve waited for our annual New Year check-up?
The Ego loves the grand gesture of a twelve month review but this can be counterproductive as we tend to only register the extreme energetic highs and lows of the past year and fail to appreciate all the many varied and subtle shifts and alignments in our life and personal energy that have assisted us on our journey.
By ‘checking in’ with yourself and the Universe more regularly through the process of mindful meditation and contemplation (say every day, week or month), you allow yourself the gift of celebrating the smaller achievements and successes in your life and you also tune into and heighten your awareness of all the positive opportunities, people, information and occurrences that have entered your life and which align with your bigger goals or dreams.
As part of your mindful meditation and review you should always spend an equal amount of time celebrating your achievements as this will undoubtedly mean that you have encountered an energy field or challenging situation and navigated your way through the centreline (Wu-Wei) successfully. Acknowledging and celebrating these milestones is in an energetic way of attracting more of the same success. This simple technique connects you to the Universal energy of abundance and following this process on a regular basis can have profound life changing consequences.
The other great bonus of a regular review it that creates the valuable time and space for subtle adjustments in your personal direction to be made if your external circumstances change, or if you find yourself moving ‘off track’ away from your harmonious Wu-Wei, or if a new, unexpected path reveals itself. Though regular meditation and contemplation you can work in partnership with the organic unfolding and evolution of life and ride this energetic flow like a surfer on the crest of a wave allowing it to propel you to your authentic potential!
Conclusions
When a stream disappears underground it does not stop flowing…
Be mindful that all life changes are like streams that travel a long way underground before they come to the surface. We cannot appreciate the subtleness and wholeness of any energy whilst swinging from one extreme to the other, therefore we need to be able to disengage, step back, reflect and above all trust ourselves and the Universe. The process of regular mindful meditation and review allows for this to happen.
Development and change are sometimes necessarily slow, because true, lasting growth is often an organic process that requires perseverance and fidelity. Always remind yourself that you are working in tandem with the Universe and natural forces.
The ancestor of our current situation is a thought…
Silence any Ego criticism and proactively look for the learning in all situations. Release the Ego’s demands that cause you impatience as being so means that you have lost faith in the Universe.
Remember, you and the Universe are one of the same, learn your lessons well and with grace, celebrate synchronicity, steadfastness and authenticity in your life, allow time and space for your destiny to unfold, and know the only limits that you behold are the ones that you enforce.
Wishing you an amazing 2012 because you are amazing!
